I never shut you out of my heart. You're still there, although you don't believe it. I didn't remove you first. I didn't, don't, never have and never will make any posts about you behind your back. I always told you that whenever you needed me, I'd be there. I always wanted you to know you could call me day or night, whenever you needed. I tried to be the best friend I could be for you through the darkest part of your life. I did everything I could to be there for you, believing I was doing what I did because you would do the exact same for me, if I was the one going through it. I hurt for your loss, weither you beleive it or not. I still hurt for you. I miss you, even if you do not believe me. I miss how you used to ignore what others thought of you, realzing that the judgement of someone who didnt even know you or anything about you didn't matter to you at all, you were above caring and wasting your lifes energy on someone elses ignorant perceptions. I miss the part of you that just didnt give a shit. I worry about you all the time. I know some of your family history, and that it is hereditary, and that yes, you are exhibiting an outbreak of symptoms by the aburpt and sudden changes you've gone through. Where's the carefree girl I once knew? Wheres the woman who called me her best friend, a loving term that filled me with joy and peace and sisterhood to hear it come from you? Why have you distanced yourself from me so far? Why are you pretending to be someone you aren't? Why are you letting yourself become the things you hate? Are you mad at me for leaving? Are you mad at me for having something you don't? What, and who, have told you you can't? I won't give up 10 years that easily. Because if this were the other way around, I don't beleive you would either. I really miss you.